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<<if lastVisited("flash") is 1>><<timed 2s t8n>> You realize you are in the entrance way again <<next>><<print either("You blink your eyes", "You wish you never pursued this Help Wanted ad", "You wonder why you left $question1")>><<next>>-- <em>"I'd like a strong shot of <<print either("$question4", "whiskey", "espresso", "clarity as to WTF is going on!")>>" </em> you mutter to yourself. <<next>> You can [[enter the hall|hall]] to the north Or go [[into the bathroom|bathroom]] to the west <</timed>> <<elseif $discovery gte 1>> <<timed 1s t8n>>You are again amidst the luminscent murk of the entryway. <<next 2s t8n>>Your stomach is gurgling. Do you want to [[move into the light|hall]] or [[return|bathroom]] to the old bathroom?<</timed>> <<else>><<timed 2s t8n>>The house is distinctly unwelcoming <<next 3s t8n>> ...but the storm is getting closer<<next 3s t8n>> and this is the correct address...<<next>> You pound on the door... <<next>> It won't budge... <<next>> until... <<next>> <<linkreplace "..the door cracks and light breaks through">> <span id="house"><<link "you enter into a murky glowing haze">> <<replace "#house" t8n>>Hungry and a bit tired, do you continue forward [[further into the strange light|hall]] or do you [[explore|bathroom]] a shadowy recess that you've noticed to the west?<</replace>> <</link>></span> <</linkreplace>><</timed>> <</if>>

<<set $discovery to $discovery+1>> <<if $key is false and $toast is false>><<timed 1s t8n>>The door is marked W.C. <<next 3s t8n>> You squint your eyes<<next 2s t8n>> you see a broken tub, sink and toilet. <<next 3s t8n>>The floor is covered with dusty footprints. <<next 3s t8n>>a lonely cabinet sits in the far north corner. <<next>>a sign on the door reads, <<next>><em>ALL BAKERY EMPLOYEES MUST WASH HANDS</em> <<next>> Puzzled by all this, you [[return|entrance]] through the door to the main entryway <</timed>> <<elseif $key is true or $toast is true>><<timed 2s t8n>>You squint your eyes...<<next 3s t8n>>The floor is covered with dusty footprints. <<next 2s>> the footprints go between a lonely cabinet on the north wall, <<next>> and [[something]] obscured in shadow, on the opposite wall. <<next 3s t8n>>Puzzled by all this, you could also [[return|entrance]] through the door to the main entryway <</timed>> <</if>>

<<if visited("nook") lt 1>><<set $discovery to $discovery +1>><<timed 2s t8n>> The kitchen is sparkling clean, <<next>>there is a sink, stove and fridge along the far wall. <<next>> Cupboards overhead. <<next>>The black and white checkered tiles on the floor clash with faded green wallpaper <<next>> You are startled by the aroma of freshly brewed coffee wafting around the room. <<next>>There is also a [[breakfast nook|nook]], peeking from around a corner. <<next>> You can still [[access the hallway|hall]] <<next>>Or you can [[go into|living-room]] the room to the north <</timed>> <<elseif visited("nook") gte 1>> <<timed 2s t8n>> You rummage through the cupboards.<<next>> <em><<print either("Oooh!", "YES!", "Alright!!", "Sweet!")>> </em><<next 1s>>you exclaim, <<next 2s t8n>>finding a stash of <<print either("Twinkies with vanilla cream filling", "Lemon Fruit Pies", "Glazed Mini Donettes", "Jumbo Honey Buns", "Apple Fruit Pies", "Coconut covered Sno Balls", "Chocolate-Vanilla HoHos")>><<next>><<set $discovery to $discovery +1>> -- You devour one of these treats.<<next>> You feel emboldened to learn more about this mysterious place. <<next>> You can still [[access the hallway|hall]] <<next>>Or you can [[go into|living-room]] the room to the north <<next>> Or you might return to the [[breakfast nook|nook]]<</timed>> <<elseif visited("message", "pouch") is 1>> <<timed 2s t8n>> You realize there will be more enticing mysteries elsewhere...<<next>> Where to next? <<next>> You can [[access the hallway|hall]] <<next>>You can [[go into|living-room]] the room to the north <</timed>> <</if>>

<<set $discovery to $discovery+1>><<if lastVisited("flash") is 1>><<timed 2s t8n>> <em>Something</em> is suddenly lurking... <<next>> It speaks to you in a stilted voice: <<next>><h2><<type 40ms>><em>Your journey from $question1 ...That's quite a distance! Perhaps some R+R is good for you....no?</em><</type>></h2> <<next 6s t8n>>The figure vanishes before you can respond. <<next 2s t8n>> In this room an old television set sits in the corner, <<next 2s t8n>>pulsating with patterns of static, <<next>>setting the room aglow intermittently. <<next>>Sometimes these patterns take on the uncanny reminiscence of $question2! <<next>> It's odd though,<<next>> the TV is not plugged in...<<next>> To the south is the [[kitchen]] To the west is the [[bedroom]] <</timed>> <<else>> <<timed 2s t8n>>In this room an old television set sits in the corner, <<next 2s t8n>>pulsating with patterns of static, <<next>>setting the room aglow intermittently... <<next 3s t8n>>Sometimes these patterns take on the uncanny reminiscence of $question2! <<next>> It's odd though,<<next>> the TV is not plugged in...<<next>> To the south is the [[kitchen]] To the west is the [[bedroom]] <</timed>> <</if>>

<<set $discovery to $discovery+1>><<if lastVisited("flash") is 1>><<timed 2s t8n>> You are in a bedroom, it seems. <<next>> Distracted, though, by an oppressive scent of Pinesol... <<next>> and a putrid odor just beneath the Pinesol. <<next 3s t8n>> You are startled by a lanky figure suddenly near you, <<next>> Their lapel reads, <em>Staff</em>,<<next 2s t8n>> Their face is shrouded,<<next 2s t8n>> They ask you: <<next 2s t8n>><<type 30ms>> <em>Do you want to rest a bit, you $question3 ? Help clear your mind of $question5 ?</em><</type>><<next 4s t8n>> You politely decline the offer... <<next 3s t8n>> You are most eager to escape the smells.<<next>> You consider: <<next 2s t8n>> Either [[exploring|living-room]] the room to the east <<next>> Or, [[returning|hall]] to the hall<</timed>> <<else>><<timed 2s t8n>>You are struck with the oppressive scent of Pinesol...<<next>> and a putrid odor just beneath the Pinesol. <<next>> There is a massive metal bedframe shrouded in dense mosquito netting <<next 3s t8n>> Eager to get away from the smells, you consider your options: <<next 2s t8n>> You can [[explore|living-room]] that room to the east <<next>> Or [[return|hall]] to the hall<</timed>> <</if>>

<<set $discovery to $discovery+1>><<if visited("flash")>> <<timed 2s t8n>>As you enter the office, <<next>>the typewriter abruptly begins typing again...:<<next>> <<type 60ms>><em> <<print either("They say beware those baring fangs but I have a sweet tooth", "You will get your just desserts!", "A toaster is a makeshift messaging app when your planchette is missing - IYKYK!", "I hope you are not feeling STRESSED...then again maybe it is a good time to rest, $question0 ??", "Curiosity killed the cat, don't ya know? You're ranked at a full $discovery on the curiousness scale!")>> </em> <</type>><</timed>> <<timed 16s>> <<goto "flash">><</timed>> <<else>> <<timed 2s t8n>>a typewriter sits on a desk with a chair. <<next>> You sit down. <<next>>The typewriter begins typing on its own!! <<next>> <em><<type 40ms>>Dear Applicant, You are a curious cat. I'd say a noteworthy $discovery on the curiousness scale, IMHO! But I am a terrible (g)Hostess. I've barely bid you welcome. Truly this bakery enterprise was condemned some time ago.. But we always make exceptions for aspiring recruits! Would you, could you, fill out this questionnaire?<</type>></em> <<next 3s t8n>><<type 30ms>> <em> What is your name? <<textbox "$question0" "">> Where are you visiting from? <<textbox "$question1" "">> What is your favorite pastry? <<textbox "$question2" "">> Are you a night owl or an early bird? <<textbox "$question3" "">> Preferred beverage with your meals? <<textbox "$question4" "">> What are you most puzzled by? <<textbox "$question5" "">> When you have answered, <<link "Sign Here" "flash">><</link>> and my staff will transport you to your quarters</em><</type>><</timed>> <</if>>

<center>[img[https://clogosphere.neocities.org/if/hom/house0.gif][entrance]]</center>

<<set $discovery to 0>> <<set $key to false>> <<set $toast to false>> <<set $nook to 0>> <<set $question1 to "home">> <<set $question2 to "Donettes">> <<set $question3 to "Curious Cat">> <<set $question4 to "sparkling water">> <<set $question5 to "the most puzzling puzzles'">> <<set $axe to "curious">> <<set $smash to 0>> <<set $finalchoice to 0>>

<<if $discovery gte 5 and $toast is true>><<timed 2s t8n>> You spend another moment with the toaster. <<next 1s t8n>> It is a very stylish design!! <<next 2s t8n>> But... you decide to continue on, and [[leave the breakfast nook|kitchen]]<</timed>> <<elseif $discovery gte 5>> <<timed 2s t8n>>Wow, you notice the impressive chromework of the toaster. <<next>> Mid-century modern breakfasts!<<next>> You notice toast in the toaster... <<next>> Do you [[take the toast?|toast]] <<next>> Or do you turn your attention to the [[Ouija board?|ouija]] <</timed>> <<else>> <<timed 2s t8n>>Oof, the elaborate chromework of the toaster irks you. <<next>>You feel dizzy from hunger<<next>> Maybe you should [[look for food|kitchen]] in the cupboards<<next 2s>> and return to these things later?<</timed>> <</if>>

<<if $discovery lte 3 and $key is false>> <<timed 2s t8n>> You hastily remove the Ouija board from the box. <<next>> You find the instructions, a small pouch, but not the planchette! <<next>> <em>No wonder it was discarded</em>, you think to yourself, <<next>> You are <em>hangry</em> and irritated. <<next>>You [[leave|kitchen]] the nook frustrated.<</timed>> <<elseif $discovery gte 4 and $key is true>> <<timed 2s t8n>>You don't need a Ouija board to convince you that something mysterious is afoot!<<next>> You can [[return to the kitchen|kitchen]] <<next>> or [[spend more time with that toaster...|toaster]]<</timed>> <<elseif $discovery gte 4>> <<timed 2s t8n>> You carefully remove the Ouija board from the box. <<next>> You find the instructions and a small pouch, but no planchette... <<next 3s t8n>> Curiosity persists...<<next>> you wonder if the planchette is [[in the pouch?|pouch]] <</timed>> <</if>>

<<if $toast is false>><<timed 2s t8n>> You pick up the toast and nibble at it. <<next>> Yuck. <<next>> You are about to put it down, <<next>> but you notice strange marks<<next>> You hesitate.<<next>> You question your perception...<<next>>...it [[looks like writing?|message]] <<next>>This place has got you spooked<<next>> Maybe you should [[check out|ouija]] the known unknowns of the Ouija board instead?<</timed>> <<else>> <<timed 2s t8n>> You are mildly disturbed by this <em>STRESSED </em>messsage...<<next 3s t8n>> Rallying your curiosity <<next>> and your courage <<next>> you try to [[consult with|ouija]] the Ouija board<</timed>> <</if>>

<<set $discovery to $discovery+1>> <<if $key is true and $toast is true>> Nothing new in here, you realize. You [[exit the breakfast nook|hall]] <<else>><<timed 2s t8n>>The breakfast nook has a table with floral pattern tablecloth. <<next 3s t8n>> There's [[a shiny metallic toaster|toaster]] <<next 2s t8n>>and a [[Ouija board game set|ouija]] <<next>>The box is stamped "Discarded."<<next 3s>> There's also the gurgling of your stomach. <<next 2s t8n>> Maybe better to [[raid the cupboards|kitchen]] for food?<</timed>> <</if>>

<<if $smash is 2>> <<timed 2s t8n>> You hesitate <<next>> but find yourself unable to resist this enticing opportunity. <<next>> You take the axe, <<next 1s>> and smash, <<next 1s>><em>smash,</em> <<next 1s>> <em>SMASH</em> <<next>> right through the wall beneath that secret word <<next 4s t8n>>Inexplicably, an ornate dining room sits beyond this wall <<next>>There are dishes of $question2 galore. $question4 is filled to the brim of silver and gold goblets, <<next>>and the most curious music is playing.<<next 4s t8n>> The (g)Hostess has materialized...<<next 2s t8n>>They nearly scream at you <<next>> <em><<type 30ms>>You've discovered our showroom, $question0? How delightful ... But, you have choices to make about your aspiring career at (g)Hostess Cakes You can choose to stay here, never return to $question1, making still a fair salary as a (g)Hostess staff baker, with opportunities to assist in production of next-level $question2 and other cutting age confections... Or...go now!! And be haunted always by $question5, your $question3 lifestyle thrown upside down, and , as my special prize for such betrayal, you will never be able to find $question2 again!! <</type>></em> <<next 20s t8n>>What is your choice? <<link "STAY">><<goto "credits">><</link>> or <<link "GO">><<goto "credits">><</link>> <</timed>> <<elseif $smash is 1>> <<timed 2s t8n>> As if channelling all your simmering nervous energy, <<next>> curiosity, <<next>> and hunger <<next>> you take the axe, <<next 1s>> and smash, <<next 1s>><em>smash,</em> <<next 1s>> <em>SMASH</em> through the wall beneath that secret word! <<next 4s t8n>>Inexplicably, an ornate dining room sits beyond this wall <<next>>There are dishes of $question2 galore. $question4 is filled to the brim of silver and gold goblets, <<next>>and the most curious music is playing.<<next 4s t8n>> The (g)Hostess has materialized...<<next 2s t8n>>They nearly scream at you <<next>> <em><<type 30ms>>You've discovered our showroom, $question0? How delightful ... But, you have choices to make about your aspiring career at (g)Hostess Cakes You can choose to stay here, never return to $question1, making still a fair salary as a (g)Hostess staff baker, with opportunities to assist in production of next-level $question2 and other benefits... Or...go now!! And be haunted always by $question5, your $question3 lifestyle thrown upside down, and , as my special prize for such betrayal, you will never be able to find $question2 again!! <</type>></em> <<next 20s t8n>>What is your choice? <<link "STAY">><<goto "credits">><</link>> or <<link "GO">><<goto "credits">><</link>> <</timed>><</if>>

<center>[img[https://clogosphere.neocities.org/if/hom/house0.gif]] <em><h2>What a $axe choice!</h2></em></center> House of Mystery by Carl Diehl | 2026 <a href="https://clogosphere.neocities.org/if/hom/hom" target="_blank">[[Try again|intro]] with the (g)Hostess gig?</a>

<<timed 2s t8n>> You decide to open up the pouch, and shake out the contents<<next 3s t8n>> Out tumbles a skeleton key! <<next 2s t8n>> And there's a note tied to it!! <<next 3s t8n>>The note reads<<next 2s t8n>> <h2><em>CAB</em></h2> <<next>> Your mind races...<<next 2s t8n>> Could this be a key for a <<cycle "$cab" autoselect>> <<option "cabin">> <<option "cabinet">> <<option "taxi cab">> <<option "cabana">> <<option "cabaret">> <<option "cabal">> <<option "cable box">> <</cycle>> <<next 8s t8n>>the possibilities <<linkappend "are intriguing!" t8n>> <<link "But.. the answers are elsewhere!" "kitchen">><<set $key to true>><</link>> <</linkappend>> <</timed>>

<<timed 3s>> <<goto `either("bedroom", "living-room", "entrance")`>> <</timed>>

<<if $key is true and $toast is false>> <<timed 2s t8n>>As you approach the shadowy thing... <<next>> You bump into a string hanging from a lightbulb<<next 3s t8n>> You pull it<<next 2s t8n>>..The room floods with light. <<next>> As your eyes adjust to the light, <<next>>you can see a word written on the wall -- <<next 4s t8n>> [img["https://clogosphere.neocities.org/if/hom/stressed.png"]] <<next>> And below that...<<next 2s t8n>> [[an axe|axe]] leaning against the wall!<<next>> Opposite this wall is the <<linkappend "cabinet" t8n>>, "Ha!" you think to yourself, $cab indeed! You are convinced now that you can [[unlock the cabinet|cabinet]] with the key<</linkappend>><<next>> <</timed>> <<elseif $key is false and $toast is true>> <<timed 2s t8n>>As you approach the shadowy thing...<<next>>You bump into a string hanging from a lightbulb<<next 3s t8n>> You pull it<<next 2s t8n>>..The room floods with light. <<next>> As your eyes adjust to the light, <<next>> you see that haunting word written on the wall <<next 4s t8n>> [img["https://clogosphere.neocities.org/if/hom/stressed.png"]] <<next>>Below that. <<next 2s t8n>> [[an axe|axe]] leaning against the wall!<<next>> You recall the message in the toast! <<next>> You are also curious about the [[cabinet]] <</timed>> <<elseif $key and $toast>> <<timed 2s t8n>>As you approach the shadowy thing...<<next>> You bump into a string hanging from a lightbulb<<next 3s t8n>> You pull it<<next 2s t8n>>..The room floods with light. <<next>> As your eyes adjust to the light, <<next>>..you see that haunting word written on the wall <<next 4s t8n>> [img["https://clogosphere.neocities.org/if/hom/stressed.png"]] <<next>> You are reminded of the message in the toast!<<next>> There's also [[an axe|axe]] leaning against the wall beneath this scrawled text! <<next 2s t8n>> Opposite this wall is the <<linkappend "cabinet" t8n>>, "Ha!" you think to yourself, $cab indeed! You are convinced now that you can [[unlock the cabinet|cabinet]] with the key<</linkappend>><<next>> <</timed>> <</if>>

<<if $key is true and $toast is false>> <<timed 3s t8n>>The cabinet unlocks! <<next>> You open the door to the cabinet <<next 2s t8n>>the shelves are full of napkins..<<next>>and a carafe of $question4 ! <<next>>You notice the interior of the cabinet door is mirrored <<next 3s>>and are startled when you see the <em>reflection</em> of the opposite wall <<next 4s t8n>> [img["https://clogosphere.neocities.org/if/hom/desserts.png"]] <<next>> The reflection! <<next>> Your mind contorts with confusion and curiosity! <<next>> A simple question excites you: <<next>> Will you find out if there are DESSERTS behind the wall??? <<link "YES" "end">><<set $smash to 1>><</link>> or <<link "NO" "end">><<set $smash to 2>><</link>> <</timed>> <<elseif $key is false and $toast is true>> <<timed 2s t8n>>The cabinet is locked.<<next 2s t8n>> You are intrigued, <<next 2s t8n>>puzzled, <<next 2s t8n>>and a bit freaked out by the repetition of this STRESSED message <<next>> You [[return to the hallway|hall]] <</timed>> <<elseif $key is true and $toast is true>> <<timed 3s t8n>>The cabinet unlocks! <<next>> You open the door to the cabinet <<next 2s t8n>>the shelves are full of napkins..<<next>>and a carafe of $question4 ! <<next>>You notice the interior of the cabinet door is mirrored <<next 3s>>and are startled when you see the <em>reflection</em> of the opposite wall <<next 4s t8n>> [img["https://clogosphere.neocities.org/if/hom/desserts.png"]] <<next>> The reflection! <<next>> Your mind contorts with confusion and curiosity! <<next>> A simple question excites you: <<next>> Will you find out if there are DESSERTS behind the wall??? <<link "YES" "end">><<set $smash to 1>><</link>> or <<link "NO" "end">><<set $smash to 2>><</link>> <</timed>> <</if>>

<<set $toast to true>> <<timed 3s t8n>>The toast looks to have a <em>word</em> burned into it! <<next 2s t8n>> [img["https://clogosphere.neocities.org/if/hom/toast.gif"]] <<next 2s>>You're unsure what "STRESSED" means...<<next 2s t8n>>but...<<next>> <<return "you keep it in mind">> <</timed>>

<<if $key is true and $toast is false>> <<timed 3s t8n>>You try to convince yourself that this scene is <<cycle "$axe" autoselect>> <<option "totally fine">> <<option "mildly bothersome">> <<option "mysterious">> <<option "probably nothing serious">> <<option "disturbing">> <<option "staged">> <<option "STRESSED">> <</cycle>> <<next 7s t8n>>Unsettled by your ruminations... <<next 3s t8n>> You consider [[leaving the bathroom|bathroom]] or alternately [[try to unlock|cabinet]] the cabinet <</timed>> <<elseif $key is false and $toast is true>> <<timed 3s t8n>>You wonder if this scene is <<cycle "$axe" autoselect>> <<option "totally fine">> <<option "mildly bothersome">> <<option "mysterious">> <<option "probably nothing serious">> <<option "disturbing">> <<option "staged">> <<option "STRESSED">> <</cycle>> <<next 7s t8n>>Unsettled by your ruminations... <<next 3s t8n>> You consider [[leaving the bathroom|bathroom]] or alternately [checking out|cabinet]] the cabinet <</timed>> <<elseif $key is true and $toast is true>> <<timed 3s t8n>>You wonder if this scene is <<cycle "$axe" autoselect>> <<option "totally fine">> <<option "mildly bothersome">> <<option "mysterious">> <<option "probably nothing serious">> <<option "disturbing">> <<option "staged">> <<option "STRESSED">> <</cycle>> <<next 7s t8n>>Unsettled by your ruminations... <<next 3s t8n>>You turn your attention to [[unlocking|cabinet]] the cabinet! <</timed>> <</if>>